TEN things my running shoes would tell me

If they could talk, the TEN things my running shoes would tell me.
#10  Thanks for avoiding all the “doggie presents” all these years.
 dog-poop-bag
#9  Please don’t leave me out on the porch to air out, I get scared someone is going to steal me away.
#8  You need to continue working on becoming more of a forefoot striker…this heavy heel strike thing is wearing me OUT.
#7  The 20 pound weight loss, sure makes my job a lot more fun when there is less of YOU to haul around.
#6  You really need to start working on a new invention, sweat bands for your ankles.  Summer training in Virginia tends to leave my insoles squishing after 13 miles.
#5  The running thing isn’t any easier on me…but I still love you!
#4  Are you going to respect me after 20 miles?
#3  What’s this whole “AIR” thing about…I thought I was going to fly!
#2  Oh no not the dryer…I don’t care if you do turn the heat off, I get so dizzy in there.
AND the number ONE thing my running shoes would tell me if they could talk:
I really enjoy the quality time we get to spend together…I’m glad I’m not, the AB glider, Buns of steel video, Slider shaper, Thigh-blaster, AB Force rower or the VHS Jane Fonda work out tapes.  In the name of Air Pegasus, those poor buggers are marooned on the island of mis-fit toys or lost in the dark, damp, and scary basement somewhere.
 misfit
Now let’s go for a run!

 

What would your running shoes tell you? 

2 thoughts on “TEN things my running shoes would tell me

  1. The Running Schlub

    Ha great post. I’m sure a number of those would be repeated by my shoes along with:
    – Thanks for running in the grass, it a lot softer
    – The trails are great, but we sure do get dirty
    – Can you wash us now and they so we dont smell of YOU all the time

    Reply
  2. Angela Murphy

    You’re getting another pair of shoes? Don’t you love me anymore? This isn’t Sister Wives – the shoe episodes!!

    Reply

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